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Skilled Listening Habits
Many of us don't often stop to think about listening habits -- after all, listening is a skill we learned as children, right? But there are ways of listening that foster clearer communication, and ensure that people feel heard, and there are ways of listening that discourage constructive dialogue between people.
The following are characteristics of more and less skilled listeners.
Perhaps you already engage in many constructive listening practices, and
these will simply be a helpful reminder. Or perhaps these will encourage you
to make changes in how you listen, both within your organization and in your
work in the world. We hope you find them helpful!
Skilled Listeners...
1) Suspend judgement and listen.
2) Focus on what the other is saying.
3) Let the other person direct the conversation.
4) Try to enter the other's frame of reference.
5) Ask questions to satisfy their own curiosity or interests.
6) Seek to understand another's perspective.
7) Sort for main ideas.
8) Keep focused on the other and what they are saying.
9) Reflect back the essence and feeling of what was said.
10) Actively encourage speaker through verbal and non-verbal cues.
Less-Skilled Listeners...
1) Immediately evaluate what is being said.
2) Spend time rehearsing what they will say next.
3) Try to steer the conversation towards the direction they want.
4) Hear everything through their frame of reference.
5) Only ask questions when the other seems to need help.
6) Disagree with other's point of view.
7) Try to take in and respond to everything.
8) Allow their mind to wander to other things.
9) Parrot back exactly what they heard.
10) Give little verbal and non-verbal response.
Skilled Listeners...
1) Suspend judgement and listen.
2) Focus on what the other is saying.
3) Let the other person direct the conversation.
4) Try to enter the other's frame of reference.
5) Ask questions to satisfy their own curiosity or interests.
6) Seek to understand another's perspective.
7) Sort for main ideas.
8) Keep focused on the other and what they are saying.
9) Reflect back the essence and feeling of what was said.
10) Actively encourage speaker through verbal and non-verbal cues.
Less-Skilled Listeners...
1) Immediately evaluate what is being said.
2) Spend time rehearsing what they will say next.
3) Try to steer the conversation towards the direction they want.
4) Hear everything through their frame of reference.
5) Only ask questions when the other seems to need help.
6) Disagree with other's point of view.
7) Try to take in and respond to everything.
8) Allow their mind to wander to other things.
9) Parrot back exactly what they heard.
10) Give little verbal and non-verbal response.
